Hi. I am having total sensory overload learning this site. Also at a loss where to put everything..Hahahaha..I have been technically married for 12 yrs but have been living away from my husband for a year and nine months. I am not sure why I say I am married anymore. I am suposed to get a divorce at the end of the year. I am sick of waiting. I have two daughters. I own a company with my mother. I am prone to insomnia. I am nocturnal.I am a vegetarian now. Took me along time to have the ability to do it. I don't care if you eat meat. I do it to be more healthy not to save some dumb cow or chicken or fish or pig. I am healthier now. So HA! I guess its due to less additives and such. I have had someone actually take this comment too serious! I used to be computer smart. Now I just know how to fix up boxes and do inventory real well. I lived in Japan for 3 yrs. I have lived in GA, S.C., NC, Fla, Minn. Ariz., Cali, Virginia, Maryland, and been lots places in the USA.Plus I went to Mexico Once. I want to go other places. Kinda all busy for that except when I am insomnic. Work and insomnia do not mix. It causes lots of errors. I am unable to debug my life program right now so Insomnia Wooohooo my dearest friend. Some of my Poetry: Leave it alone By HeatherYou stand thereI hear youNothing to be donethe pain too strongNumbing effectCan't moveDon't movethe floor will eat youDon't reach for itLeave it alonePeace is notwhat you desireDesire lays to the eastcan you say more?will you touch?does it hurt?Sharing this diseaseLooking for an outWhen will it end?Can it be ended?How long can youhold on to me like this?Will you leave me?If you do then I shallnot stayYou hold me to this worldmore than you knowCan I break the wall?How many pieces?Why are they asking?Make them stop!No I am not alrightonly you seeonly you hear how muchI slip on this mask againto forget where I have been!Novelty Guy Just What Do You See? By Heather Looking off in the distance there is a point where you can see. The fine line where you make out the details of the dream Standing there with your stern looks and dull armor you must Face your worse nightmare of time telling the moment of your inner battle coming to the masses. Will you win the struggle to dominate your fears? Hands out with hopes so strong looking to find the twin to your name. Wondering do I do it all in vain. As you walk the front line and moving from song to song. Thinking of times gone past when the blankets warm with her lingering scent. The smile you shared but did not dare. Somewhere the honey hair spills on the water of some other desire. As you stare straight down into despair. Grappling with hope and lady luck you move through the sludge. Time calls the drummer to sound to the distance a pledge that will not be broken. Dare the others stand aware of the knife dripping with blood. Can they see it in your eyes or does it take a matching soul to hear the sound of fighting in the valley? Do they see you will not dishonor? Do they know your hearts desire? In your view the righteous acts will be done. You will fight till the end comes. Stand by me with your torn skin open bleeding wounds and I will sow them closed and lay you to rest. Breathe will flow in the tortured sound sending me to a complete relapse of sight. Shall we then lean on each other and trip and stumble off this field of the slain. Kulpkud" 1998 by Heather Today I found a light shining hidden in the flesh of a man. Stone cold was the light As a spark it would fade. As a rainbow it shined so bright. My soul called out with force from that brilliance that smothered my eyes, covered my heart and danced on my skin.Lost Dream 1-5-06 There standing in the rubble of my dreams was the lost voiceForever remembered in the depths of the black hole.Oh, the sun begins and ends on the shadow of yourSkin soft as nightshade petals and just a poisonous memory.Linked between the void with a tethered rope I will hold tillMy hands turn black and rot off. The conscious link of the eternal question of release from theEtched stones placed in perfect pointsMemory stands against time with a small amount of sanityTo hold the hand of the child that must be lifted to highest point.I have lost the hope needed to keep the truth inside. I have let it go and will not hide it.For the day has come for me to drop these dreams in the fire pit of hell and know that I was consumed long ago. I will never see the day I wanted to the most. I shall see the walking corpses as they say help. I will see the earth rise and take hold of the trees with all her might. Never shall I see the face of hope again. No Named Poem 11-2005 I call out in the mist my echo returns Lost in a dream that will never return Doomed to wander seeking the truth Looking for the one who caused the opening of my eyes Alive or Dead is the song in my head Take my hand I will go to hell with you if I can Standing at the gates They will not let us in Immortal souls forever ban from seeing a heaven or a hell We must find each other or be forever alone