OK, Teri, this sounds a bit like what I made, probly used cream of mushroom soup for sauce. Let me know if it sounds right then I can stop looking, you have no idea how many cook books I have stuffed here and there. My brain is really straining to try to remember something I made once about 16 years ago.......
CREAMY HAM & CAULIFLOWER CASSEROLE
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1 med. head cauliflower
2 c. cooked, cubed ham
1 can mushrooms, drained
1/3 c. flour
4 tbsp. butter
1 c. milk
1 c. cubed sharp Cheddar cheese
1/2 c. sour cream
1 c. bread crumbs
1 tbsp. butter
Break cauliflower into buds. Cook covered until tender. Drain. Combine ham and mushrooms.
In medium saucepan melt 4 tablespoons butter. Stir in flour. Add milk all at once. Cook and stir until mixture thickens and bubbles. Add cheese and sour cream. Stir until cheese melts.
Combine with cauliflower and ham mixture. Mix well. Combine bread crumbs and 1 tablespoons butter. Sprinkle on top. Bake uncovered 40 minutes at 350 degrees until bubbly.